The evolution of the weekend in simple mathematical equations

There are lots of ways we move through the weekend, and what equates to the typical weekend changes over time. Here is my evolution, in simple mathematical equations. I’m sure there is a more complicated way to do this, but, as my children will attest, I have forgotten everything I learned in Calculus.

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teens: football game + sleep in until noon + PopTart + afternoon at the lake + babysit + date with a cute boy from my bio class = weekend 👙
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twenty-something: (work second job + beer + party + sleep in + breakfast at a diner + hike a few miles + watch old movies on couch + Kraft Macaroni and Cheese for dinner) x 2 = weekend 🍺
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thirty-something: party + margaritas + toddlers wake me at 6 a.m. + animal shaped pancakes + caffeine + nap when the kids nap because I can’t party like I used to + Scooby Doo Kraft Macaroni and Cheese + cuddle puddles + reading “Mike Mulligan and his Steam Shovel” = weekend 🥞

forty-something: drive kids to movie + get up one child up early to take SAT + sports + breakfast biscuit on the run (“forget” to log the calories) + more sports + no time for hike, walk around sports field + teen sleepover + Annie’s Organic Macaroni and Cheese + “those girls were up all night talking and now I’m a zombie” + caffeine, caffiene, caffeine + “did anyone walk the dog? You kids said if we got a dog, you would help!” + dog walk = weekend 🐕
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fifty-something: nice dinner out + prosecco + Gruyere and artisan applewood bacon Macaroni & Cheese + sleep in until 7:30 a.m. + read paper + steel cut oats + elliptical machine + feet up in front of fire + read a book + snuggles with the dog = weekend 🥂

sixty-something: not there yet, but x + y/z = weekend, solve for x, y and z